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An Oath of Blood & Thunder
Well, let me continue telling you my little soap opera...where the hell was I...oh ya, spooky metal feet...right then.
As the Rikti who called himself Sobek watched, a massive mechanical arm
reached down from the ceiling of the room. At the end of it was a large
injection needle. Did I tell you I’m afraid of needles? When I
was nine, I accidently stabbed my cousin Philip in the thigh with one I
found on the street. Next thing we know, he has syphilis. Don’t
worry, I got grounded for a month and he got penicillin. So, this huge
ass needle was coming down at me and all of the sudden, I blurted out
“I hope this isn’t gonna be an anal probe, cause I don’t swing that way, ET!”
I dunno, it just felt natural. Cracking jokes in the face of evil. I do
it all the time now, but then it was new to me and felt so right. Well,
it was the right thing to do cause it confused the hell out of that
Rikti. I don’t think the Rikti actually have a sense of humor,
even non-solider Rikti. “Face evil with a madcap grin on your
face, and ye’ll always win”. Another saying of Uncle Pat.
So, that Rikti freak is lookin’ at me all confused and then outta
nowhere, the door blasts open.
This memory, I think, is burned into my brain. Out of the smoke of the
blasted door flies out the guy who would become my role model. On his
face, a madcap grin and lightning in his fists. His colors were blue
and black with electricity flying around him. Sobek and this hero
locked eyes for a minute and did sort of a cowboy, John Wayne stand
off. Sobek had his blaster in his left hand and this hero had
electricity in his right fist. As they prepared to draw-
The needle had met its mark. It had peirced my right shoulder, injecting into it a blue
fluid that felt cold but powerful. I love speaking all poetic. Anyways, all I could thing about
(besides where my Uncle Pat was) was “Oh my god, they’re
gonna turn me into a lost monster!”. oh, another phobia I have is
one of monsters like the Lost. By the by, the hero and Sobek were
fighting at this point, the hero trying to get to me, but Sobek was
blocking his every move with his laser blaster. Now, the pain from the
needle had woken me up. Using the strength I got from my natural
instincts helped me slip out of the straps holding me down to the
table. I took the needle out of my arm with a grunt and looked at it.
Now, I’m no great shakes at understanding the Rikti writing, but
the words looked sorta like the word “Sparky”.
Back to the fight. Sobek was gaining the upper hand at this point and
this hero needed some help. So, I decided to give this Rikti scum
payback, drunk bar fighting style. So, I grabbed a metal equipment
table with syringes and saws and stuff and smashed it over Sobeks head.
And...IT WORKED! That alien piece of trash was out like a light. The
hero looked down at Sobek, up to me, then back to Sobek.
Hero: Kid, I gotta tell ya, most civies would back down and let the hero be beat, then escape, but you got some spirit on ya.
Kenny: uh, thanks...what’s your name anyway?
Hero: Sparky. You?
Kenny: Kenny...wait, where’s my uncle Pat?!
Sparky: Relax, he went to the cops after he came to and told them what
happened. They new about a possible Rikti lab nearby and sent me to
rescue ya. So, you wanna leave?
It had just occurred to me that we were standing over an deceased
alien(he looked dead. Smelled it too) in a massive and terrifying
laboratory. So we left and he dropped me off at Paragon Police
Department. Oh, I forgot something! I have a cop uncle! Weird huh, cop
uncle and gangster uncle? Alex McClog, PPD detective. He works in the
Meta-human Criminal Investigation Department. Basically, he hunts down
heroes who go rouge and commit a crime. He’s a mutant too, Super
Strength. Never wanted to be a hero though. Crap, I’m getting
side tracked, lemme just bring you to our parting
Sparky: you know, you shouldn’t have been out this late. For Christ’s sake, it’s 4:00 AM.
Kenny: what?! Oh man, my moms gonna kick my ass!
Sparky: Don’t worry, I talked to Mrs. Harkenson 3 hours ago and she just wants you home and safe. Well, I gotta fly.
And with that he was gone, leaving me in front of PPD. I watched him
fly off while talking on a cell phone. Probably to his contact I
thought. I then looked at my should were the needle had stuck me. And
my blood went cold. What if they injected me with a Lost mutagen? What
if I’ll turn into a monster, like all those homeless guys? What
if that vial had something to do with Spa-
Uncle Alex. “Now I’m screwed” I thought. I looked at
him rushing out of PPD putting on his coat. Oh, he live in his office
once in a while, when he’s working on tough cases. He has a
hammock in there with a small dresser. Anyways, when I saw him running
too wards me, he looked scared as hell.
Kenny: Uncle Alex, what’s wrong?
Uncle Alex: Kenny, it’s your apartment. Somebody set it on fire.
Kenny, they said something on the dispatcher about a fatality on the
“God doth loveth his little jokeths”
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